40 Best Birthday Jokes About Turning 40 Best Life
You might be staring down your 40th birthday like it's the barrel of a gun, but turning the big 4-0 shouldn't be all doom and gloom. By now you've probably got a fairly good grasp on who you are. You know who your real friends are, and you've finally found somebody who will reliably give you a decent haircut. Things are looking up!
Now that your mood has been bolstered, it's time to have a laugh at your own expense. Take the edge off of any upcoming birthday jitters with a few 40th birthday jokes about finally getting to the top of (and going over) the hill. So read on, and enjoy! And if you'd like some more age-appropriate humor, check out 50 Dad Jokes So Bad They're Actually Hilarious.
And you hope it isn't for you!
For more silliness beyond 40th birthday jokes, here are 50 Amazing Jokes from Comedy Legends.
"You have the body of a 20-year-old … but you should return it. You're stretching it all out of shape!"
For more on aging gracefully, here are the 10 Ways to Feel Better About Your Body After 40.
Really, 40 kids is more than enough!
Oh, and speaking of your little ones: Here are the 40 Lies Kids Say That Parents Always Fall For
"Up until then, you are just doing research." — Carl Jung
When the candles cost more than the cake!
For more great laughs, don't miss these 40 Hilarious Things Everyone Has Secretly Done.
"The older she gets the more interested he is in her." — Agatha Christie
Gives your brain a list of things it's not going to do anymore!
For more utter goofiness, be sure to check out the 50 Knock-Knock Jokes Guaranteed to Crack You Up.
The trick is to keep it from creeping down to the rest of your body!
If this joke hit too close to home, be sure to check out the 40 Great Exercises for Adding Muscle After 40.
If you're a tree!
And for more hilarity, check out the 50 Jokes From Children That Are Crazy Funny.
Your age!
For more on aging, here are the 40 Things No One Ever 40 Should Ever Do.
My wife hasn't had a birthday in six years!
"Ask anyone who's bald!" — Rodney Dangerfield
Yes, that easily could qualify as one of the 50 Dad Jokes So Bad They're Actually Hilarious.
You only have half the metabolism!
But don't fret. If you're actually worried, Stay Young and Lean With These 20 Anti-Aging Foods.
She just tells everyone she's as old as me. Then she lies about my age!
And for more side-splitters, don't miss the 30 Funniest Sitcom Jokes of All Time.
Every time you suck in your gut, your ankles swell!
At least you're not end-aged!
It couldn't be any other way with that many candles on your cake.
In your 40s: dress like you walk cats!
Especially if you take them while driving!
You're old enough to recognize your mistakes, but young enough to make some more!
It's too hard to get up again!
Here's hoping it's as good as last year's was!
I'm dead!
And your body has other ideas.
Like a little peace and quiet when the kids move out!
But forget where you're going. It will only scare you!
They turn 39.95 plus shipping and handling!
But never remembers her age!
When you have more candles on your cake than friends at your birthday party!
It means you're also a parent!
Is standing up!
The more you have, the longer you live!
Are the 10 years between 39 and 40!
But immaturity lasts a lifetime!
"And lie about your age." — Lucille Ball.
I'm 18 with 22 years of experience!
"But so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story to the same person, three or four times." — Helen Rowland
"is the 'all day long' face of your 40's." — Libby Reid
Except now it's all lower.
You might be right!
Ease the burn from these 40th birthday jokes with The 40 Best Compliments to Give People Over 40.
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